We don’t like to look too closely at the parts of us that fall short.  We don’t like to be reminded of the talents that we don’t have.  

For me, I am not a good cook.  You may think “Just grab a box of mac n cheese and call it good!”  and trust me, some nights, that’s exactly what I do.  I  wasn’t blessed with the gift of multitasking in the cooking world…  normally, I can juggle different tasks lined up behind each other and not get overwhelmed.  But if I have to remember to start boiling the rice five minutes into the chicken cooking, whilst simultaneously checking on the corn in the oven, and basting the chicken in the pan at the same time, while somehow keeping a mental timer of what dish starts and finishes at what time??!!!

Hand me the mac n cheese box.  I give up. 

It's not that I don't try.  It's that I'm not Hercules.  Not yet anyways.  I'm not good at everything.  I can't do what comes naturally to others.  It's not easy for me.  It's not even easy for me to think about.  The times I have tried to cook, I may stick to the recipe, but I’ll use the wrong pan, or I only make one dish.  Honey, tonight we are having meatballs.  Just meatballs.  *facepalm* When I picture the "perfect housewife" I think of a husband coming home from work, to a warm furnace, dinner on the table, freshly cleaned house, and a wife just as excited to see him as the dog is.  This isn't everyone's reality and I know that.  I seem to be fulfilling my duties in every other aspect besides cooking... which is the one that usually matters most to food loving men. 

To make matters worse, my sister-in-law is a chef.  Yes, a real, certified, cooks meals for millionaires, chef.  On the upside, I’m never asked to cook at family dinners (Praise the lord).  I’m very insecure about my cooking.  I watch people intently when they taste my food… if there’s the slightest hint of an upturned nose, I will silently vow to never cook again! Until tomorrow, when my husband reminds me that he needs food to survive.  In which case I’ll mutter something about it being inconvenient that humans cant live on cookies alone. 

My strength is baking.  I love baking.  I will bake pie and cookies all day long! Sadly, I’m reminded that lemon bars aren’t a proper dinner meal, and cheesecake can only be consumed so many times before it gets boring.  I can’t use my strength to make up for my weakness.  Baking isn’t what is needed from me.  My household needs me to cook.  I need to multitask and learn.  Cooking is actually stressful for me! I get anxious just thinking about meal planning.  

This year, or at least this week, I’m going to focus on my weaknesses.  As painful and frustrating as they may be, I won’t improve my cooking skills by baking cookies.  I will improve by actually cooking meals, failing horribly at said meals, and by opening the recipe book and trying again.  Focusing on weakness is not pretty at times, but you aren't going to get stronger by doing something you're already excelling at.. like sitting on the couch.  Be encouraged, be patient with yourself, focus on your weaknesses, don't ignore them. 

I am eternally grateful for my patient husband, who has consumed food not fit for the human body more times than I can count. 

-Carlee

1 Comment